The
Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Now here
Hollywood got it right.
It’s a
scene from the Good, the Bad and the Ugly. A one-armed bounty hunter (Al
Mulock) thinks he has a bubble-bathing Tuco (Eli Wallach) right where he wants
him, with his pants down – actually off. Tuco shoots and kills his adversary with a
hidden pistol.
Bath
scenes were rightfully rare in Westerns because bathing in the Old West was as well. Pioneers
and cowboys initially held a peculiar
notion that washing often would harm
their health. They feared that frequent bathing would leave their pores
vulnerable, becoming breeding grounds for bacteria and disease. And simply put,
it was a hassle - a real pain in the _ss
- to haul buckets of water into the house, heat them up, and fill a tub.
Then you had to empty it. Besides, there was no way to buy a real tub until
Sears, Roebuck & Co. began publishing mail-order catalogs in 1894. In 1895.
A Sears catalog tub cost around $22.50, about $900 today. Over time more of
the tubs found their way into western
homes and the "Saturday night bath" was
established because everyone wanted to be clean for church on Sunday. Family members shared the same bathwater,
though, yes, one at a time. During the 1800s trail riders too eventually found
the need for an occasional bath. By the
1850s, three types of public baths were available. The most common bathhouse
had private tubs, like the one Tuco used. Then there was the public bathhouse,
and the third kind is not mentioned here because I did not want to post a Content
Warning.
Many
people think of the American west just
as a glamorous place, but it was far
from that. Nasty, questionable, and unsanitary practices were abundant.
While the
chances were good you didn’t have a tub at home; the odds were even better you
had no toilet. There were none as we know them today.
Buy you a
drink?
The world
of old western saloons was a time when booze flowed freely, but don’t look for
“Top Shelf” liquor. Many “bars” were
makeshift saloons known for serving a notorious brew called "rotgut."
This was poor-quality random liquors
combined with who knows what that often
made people sick. If it didn’t, then maybe this did. The bar rails were adorned with towels to wipe your hands or maybe mop the subs from your beer soaked beard.
This courtesy provided a breeding ground for germs galore.
People
often settled close to streams and were besieged by flies and gnats by day and
mosquitoes by night. Families all ate dinner together. It was a family meal
alright. Everybody ate from a common platter and drank from common tin cups.
Indigestion was almost assured -Just don’t look for the Tums – and the water
from those streams often caused dysentery.
“Don’t
forget to brush.” You never heard that from Mom after the family meal ‘cause no
one did. People seldom brushed their teeth, if ever, except maybe at public eating places like
boarding houses, saloons and stagecoach
stations where a community toothbrush,
made from cattle bone and hog bristles might be available. No Colgate
smiles here.
Yes, the
frontier was a difficult place to call your home. Settlers were often ashen
with fever, gaunt, scrawny, and just plum worn-out.
Their children were sickly, distressed and often arrived at “tails end”-
wherever that was – with fewer parents and siblings than they had when their
journey began. Their diets were poor, and those vittles seldom included vegetables.
People dwelled in primitive surroundings with lice, fleas, and bedbugs. But
really boys and girls, moms and dads, ladies, and gentlemen, you already know much
of this While those people on the
western frontier led a hardscrabble life, it’s old news. Either from stories,
articles, schoolbooks or just plain common sense and intuition, you know that
the real frontier was vastly different than the Iconic Old West. It was a hard
life sure, but nevertheless romantic ideals tied to the American West are not
buried on Boot Hill. They remain alive - as alive today as the day they came to life.
As a result, the American West and its colorful people and landscapes still
remain a popular culture as well as a popular history, even though the time of
the “Cowboys and the Indians” was relatively short.
The Old
West is mythologized as a place where people haven’t changed much. It’s like
the Twilight Zone’s Willoughby. Just as they were in the old days, folks are
steadfast, hard-working, and follow an impeccable honor code. Today many of us
work indoors in blue and white collar jobs.
We have little or no opportunity
to soak in the “Big Sky,” the big valleys, deserts, and the open range
that inspires nostalgic respect for the frontier life. But we don’t jump on the band wagon – make
that covered wagon - and turn our backs
on the heroic frontier story told in
countless, books, movies and Gunsmoke
episodes. We abide by the notion that the West was “tamed” through an unbroken
series of triumphs and acts of individual courage. Who among us would have the
grit – and the “gumption” – the spirited
initiative and resourcefulness to do what these pioneers and settlers were able
to achieve? Our love for the West is based in part on the stories we tell ourselves—a subjective
experience colored by the unconscious and by our culture at large.
Any
attempt to disparage our American heritage by dismantling cherished fables
about the West and stripping away some of the
romance from the history of “Wagons
Ho,” does not change an important fact.
The Wild West, Old West, or just the American West was a complex convergence of strong and
determined peoples, communities, and cultures that decisively shaped the face
of America – an America we love and should love.
Yes there
was certainly “The Good,” as well as “the Bad,”
and as for the “Ugly,” well, we just choose to look beyond it.
“New land
is harsh, vigorous, and sturdy. It scorns evidence of weakness. There is
nothing of sham or hypocrisy in it. It is what it is, without an apology."
J. E. Lawrence in the Nebraska State
Journal.
Rollin',
rollin', rollin'
Rollin',
rollin', rollin'
Keep
movin', movin', movin'
Though
they're disapprovin'
Keep them
dogies* movin'
Rawhide!
Don't try
to understand 'em
Just rope
and throw and brand 'em
Soon we'll
be living high and wide.
My heart's
calculatin'
My true
love will be waitin'
Be waiting
at the end of my ride.
God Bless
America – You can’t say that often
enough.
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